Moments of Peace

Theres comes a time in a mans life...a womans life...a humans life where we find ourselves in union with that which we call the universe, now before you think me a quack or a few bricks short here me out. We find ourselves outside of our humanity and the emotions that bind us to the flesh and our earthly forms; things like love, hate, pain, remorse, sadness, happiness and instead a calm washes over us and find peace for that one fleeting moment all the world vanishes and we are one with a feeling that even when it touches us for just one moment it heals our scattered souls and brings us one step closer to peace. For me these little moments are the mortar thats keeps my soul together when all it wants to do is fall apart. I find many things can bring these things on but it seems they all have one common factor that sets this universal awareness in motion...when we are still! I know it sounds strange but for me when you are sitting at a coffee shop or backpacking through beautiful mountains you set down and suddenly there is no sound, no world around all earthly faculties simply disappear and you are trans ported into that place where time and space coexist and you have a direct line to God and the universe. You realize we are connected to everything in existence and every living thing is a part of us as we are a part of it. The cruelty we humans so often inflict on each other and the creatures that exist along side of us suddenly becomes clear we are all one. When I finally do come out of these trances of peace a great sadness often follows because unlike the feeling I embraced just moments ago I realize that I can only change my little part in the world and not the world or its people. I have realized though we live in a great web of life all interconnected so what I have begun to do is just to change what I can in my life so those directly around me will be affected. I hope in turn I will touch them and they in turn will spread the change throughout the great web we call our lives. I hope that the change i am promoting is a positive one because in reality I have many negative traits but I think now my positive are not out weighing the negative in number. But as I say so often only time will tell. Until then I will enjoy my moments of Peace!

Faith in Humanity Renewed!

OK! My faith in humanity is renewed once more because of a random act of kindness shown to me. I thought I had failed my Finance class when out of the blue I get a second chance nuff said; you want the details of that talk to me in person. Because of that kindness though I am renewed and my plans are starting to take fruit. I am trying to get accepted into a university in Australia right now; with any luck I will be on a boat headed that way soon. Me and the little red dog on a new adventure once more. If that should fail i am going to apply to radiology school; yes I know a completely different direction but a new change that is so desperately needed in my life right now. My adventure with finding Asian love have ended for now I have discovered that women are women no matter where they are from. So I am devoting myself to finding a new job elsewhere and making money so I may pay off the last of my debt. Child support will be done in the next few years, you know I don't mind paying it if I only knew my baby girl was getting her money. Just haft to have faith in that one. My buddy Ryan needs to get a hold of me so we can do some serious backpacking soon for real need that mountain air you know! I hope that one day I find love somewhere and that she is true and has no boyfriends or emotional baggage, that seems to be the MO of my last few relationships dammit. That needs to change big time in my life. Well enough ranting I just want to share my good fortune which allowed me to graduate and start in a new direction in my life while making me realize hard work is recognized and rewarded for those willing to put forth the effort. Thank you humanity for never ceasing to surprise even a skeptic like me! My faith in humanity is renewed once more!